Ten Things I Hate About You, Mr. NBA

1. Leave the bench, get suspended rule- so let me get this straight, the Spurs are allowed to benefit when Big Shot BRob pulls a Marty McSorley on Steve Nash? Amare Stoudemire and Boris Diaw come to the aid of teammate, an obvious human reaction, yet they are punished for this by having 2 starters suspended while the Spurs have a marginal role player suspended? How is that fair? The Suns were the best team in the playoffs when playing with their full roster and basically got screwed harder than an 18 year old Jenna Jameson.
2. Vlade Divac, Manu Ginobili, Anderson Verejao, and all other floppers- who flops more: NBA players or Mitt Romney?
3. Zebras- How are NBA refs worse as a whole than NFL refs, even though they're full time employees? Does anyone else besides the ref who made the call actually believe that Lebron kicked the ball with about 2 minutes left in the game and only 2 seconds left the Spurs' shot clock? Seriously, in what other professions would someone the age of Dick Bavetta still be employed, especially considering that running up and down the court is part of his job description. The Yokozuna formerly known as Charles Barkley can outrun him, and he hasn't missed a trip to the Sizzler since 2000.
4. Kevin McHale, Billy King, Elgin Baylor, Billy Knight, Mitch Kupchack, Isiah Thomas- all of these guys have had extended runs as NBA general managers and STILL suck at their job.

• McHale cost his team multiple first round draft picks because of a secret deal with Joe Freaking Smith.
• Billy King- has single-handedly turned Philly from a perennial Eastern Conference contender to a team that struggle to struggle to make the playoffs. Mo Cheeks was a good coach for the JailBlazers, but he can't do anything with the current Philly roster.
• Elgin Baylor- has made 2 good moves in his career- the trade that brought in Elton Brand for Tyson Chandler and signing Sam Cassell 2 years ago.
• Mitch Kupchack- this is the guy that thought trading Shaq for Lamar Odom, Brian Grant, Caron Butler, and the pick that ended up being Jordan Farmar. 3 years later and the Heat have an NBA title and the Lakers have Kobe Bryant trying to get out since he has no one else to help him win. Plus, Caron Butler sure looks a lot like Kwame Brown these days.
• Isiah Thomas- Do I really need to say more? Steve Francis. Stephon Marbury. Renaldo Balkman in the first round (could have had him in the second round)
  

5. Buzz Peterson is a director of player personnel- Yes, this is the guy who thought Boomer Herndon was a legitimate SEC center and Dane Bradshaw was an SEC caliber point guard. Why couldn't I have been rommates with MJ?
6. The CBA- teams that do well in scouting the second round are screwed after 2 years (Carlos Boozer and Gilbert Arenas) when they can't re-sign them for as much as other teams can offer, yet a team that screws up with a first round pick has a guaranteed contract riding the bench. I guess I have to give kudos to Billy Hunter for negotiating this deal for the players.
7. Drew Gooden- he paid hundred of dollars for a calculator from the 1980s and apparently has the reverse condition of Rasheed Wallace- he can only grow hair in a small part of his head (Wallace has the famous bald spot).
8. Chad Ford- the only guys that don't hate him are Darko Milicic and Nikoloz Tskitishvili. In 5 years, Yi Jianlan will join this esteemed list.
9. No penalty for tanking- teams clearly out of the playoffs don't try their best to try for a better lottery position, yet the fans are still paying full price to watch the Bucks play the Celtics with Brian Scalabrine and Sebastian Telfair playing integral roles in the game.
10. Manu Ginobili- Did I mention that I hate the way he plays yet? I seriously don't know whether Ginobili actually thinks he's never committed a foul because I'm starting to think yes. Seriously, he actually thought he didn't foul Damon Jones at the end of game 4, even though replay showed an obvious foul. Memo to Manu: if Lebron doesn't get the benefit of subjective calls, you're definitely not going to either. Someone needs to break this guy's nose...again.